January 20, 2020


Dear Jesus,

I ask you today, to fill my heart with JOY. Please fill my husband’s, my childrens’ my brothers’, my sisters’ all of my nieces’, all of my nephews’, all of my in- laws’, my dear friends’, all those who read my posts and my blogs, and my wonderful church family’s ‘ hearts with abundant and overflowing joy today, tomorrow and every day after that!


Jesus first

Others second

Yourself last


This morning I put Jesus first. I prayed. I read His Word. I am reminded that JESUS is my Wonderful counselor! JESUS is my my Mighty God! JESUS is my Everlasting Father! JESUS is my Prince of Peace! It is Jesus who can fill my heart with joy even with stage 4 kidney disease and cancer and a mastectomy and chemotherapy. Jesus is my good shepherd. I am his lamb. He will watch over me wherever I am. ( Psalm 23, John 10)


Yesterday I put someone else second. I made a special dessert for a friend and her family. It filled my heart with joy! It gives me great joy when I can do something for someone else. When I have a fundraiser to help rescue and restore girls and boys from human trafficking it fills my heart with joy! When I collect blankets to give to homeless people it fills my heart with joy! When I send picture postcards to my sweet little great-nieces and great-nephews, it fills my heart with joy! When I support my church financially it fills my heart with joy! When I have a clean house and a hot meal for my husband to come home to after he works hard all day it fills my heart with joy! There is great joy in putting others second.


You all know I battle with depression. I need to remember I am important too. I feel so much better when I take care of myself. If I am eating right, getting enough sleep, getting out of bed, showering, getting dressed, reading God’s Word, praying, doing the things I enjoy doing, ( blogging, reading emails and posts on FaceBook, looking at beautiful photos on Instagram, feeding my birds, caring for my dogs, having a hot cup of coffee, playing Words With Friends, sitting outside) I feel so much better. It is not a sin to take good care of myself and to enjoy life.


May JESUS give you joy as you put him first, others second, and yourself last.

#Community#Growth#Health#Wellness#Happy#Happiness#Inspirational# discover#Motivation#Life#Personaldevelopment#Dailypost#Postaday#Smile#Differentsmiles#Reasonstosmile#Mentalhealth#Mentalillness#Selfhelp#Selfcare#Relationships#Reflection#Feelings#Honesty#Lifestyle#Sadness#Dreams#Hope


January 19, 2020

I was reading my Bible today and God led me to this passage of Scripture. It was such a blessing to me that I wanted to share it all with you. What a comfort to know that He hears us, He loves us and He will be with us during the most painful times of our lives.

Dear Father,

If we have sin in our lives, please on blind our eyes and reveal our sin to us. Help us to repent of our sins, and stop doing or saying those things we ought not to be doing and saying. Please change us, mold us, and make us more like Jesus. Help us to love and forgive those who have wronged us. Please bless us and give us joy and peace in our lives. Help us to take the time to read your word, and talk to you in prayer. Your Word is such a comfort, encouragement, and inspiration to us. Your word is a lamp unto our feet, and a light unto our path. In Jesus name I pray, amen.



January 19, 2020


Well, the title may be a bit misleading because there are times when I feel sorry for myself. But most of the time I realize that I am blessed, even favored by God. I have so many things to be thankful for.



Even at my worst, when I feel totally unloveable, God loves me. I have said and done terrible things but God still loves me. Jesus left the throne of heaven, was born to a virgin, died on a cross to pay for my sin and rose from the dead. When I repented, trusted in Jesus, asked Him to forgive me and be my Lord and my Savior, He forgave all of my sins, past, present and future. He adopted me, made me a part of His family, and when my last day on earth comes I will leave this life and have eternal life with Him in heaven. One day I will see my loved ones who have gone on before me.


I once said that as a child I wanted to be a movie star because I wanted to be loved by a lot of people. In a couple of months I will be fifty nine years old. In my lifetime I have loved and been loved by so many people all over the USA. God pours out buckets of love to me using people. I am especially grateful for a great husband, a loving family, caring friends and wonderful church families, past and present. I am grateful for those who read my blogs and Facebook posts.


Life truly is a gift. I invite all of my women friends out to lunch every year in March to celebrate my birthday. I always tell people a birthday is a chance to celebrate another year of life that God has given us. I once heard someone say that growing old is a privilege that is denied to many.


For over ten years, I lived in a tiny two room apartment. I shared three bathrooms with 20 men and women. I fully expected to grow old and die there. Now I have a nice home on 5 acres of beautiful land, with woods, a garden, a picnic table, a fire pit, pretty trees and a view of horses at our neighbors. I share my home with my husband, two loving dogs and a pretty cat. Like Job, I have been through a lot of heartache and pain, but God has blessed me late in my life.


I lived with my son and his wife in Prescott Valley, Arizona and El Cajon/San Diego, California. Those six months were some of the happiest months of my life and I will treasure those happy memories forever.


My husband is an answer to my prayers. I know I said I had accepted that I would spend the rest of my life alone but every once in a while I prayed and asked God to give me a man that would love me. God saw my loneliness, the longing in my heart and my willingness to remain single if it was God’s will. Instead, God gave me a great husband. My husband has put up with a lot. He has never left me despite my mental and physical illnesses and accidents. He will stay by my side through the removal of my breasts and chemotherapy. I asked him once why he never left me. He said, “For better for worse, for richer poorer…” “In sickness and in health?” I finished. Always the comedian my husband answered, “Oh no, I did not say anything about sickness and in health.”


I have loved my life of travel. I have been blessed with travels to Canada, Mexico, France and Germany. I have seen every state in the USA except for Alaska, Hawaii and New Mexico. I have seen Mount Rushmore, Niagara Falls, the Rocky Mountains, deserts, prairies, big cities, farmlands, the Great Lakes, the Atlantic and Pacific Oceans, the Mississippi River and the Gulf of Mexico. I have loved every minute of it. I only wish I had taken more photos of my travels. I have also loved my fun times playing with my grandchildren. I have so enjoyed my weekend camping trips with my husband exploring Michigan our trip to Buffalo, New York and Holyoke, Pittsfield and Boston, Massachusetts. I have loved playing mini golf with Chuck, going to movies, going for rides on the back of Chuck’s motorcycle, to zoos, to fireworks on the Fourth of July, for scenic drives in the country in all of the different seasons. Chuck makes me laugh. We have so much fun together.


Yes, I am grateful to have cancer. First of all, they found my cancer early. It was God that led me to have my mammogram when I did, and it is God who gives the doctors the wisdom to take such good care of me. I will have to take drastic measures to live and it won’t be fun, but I still hope to grow old with my husband. Chuck and I see life as more valuable than we did before. We don’t argue over stupid stuff as much as we used to. I appreciate him so much more. He appreciates me so much more. We are thankful for life and for love and for God Himself. Cancer brings us closer to God, as we are humbled and we see how much we need Him. Cancer gives us love and compassion for others. God has a purpose and a plan for my life and promises to bring good out of the things that happen to us. God uses these trials to help us to be more like Him.


I could continue to list the reasons I can not feel sorry for myself, but these are the most important reasons. Thank you for taking the time to read this lengthy blog, and my other blogs.

Dear Father in heaven,

I thank you for your many blessings in my life. Most of all I think you for giving me a great husband, loving friends and family, wonderful in-laws, an awesome church, and people who take the time to read my blogs and Facebook posts. I ask that you help me to keep this attitude of gratitude and not sink into self-pity and despair in the tough days ahead. I think you for all of the people who love me and pray for me and Chuck. I ask that you bless each one, and help me to be a blessing to each one. Yes Lord, help me to be a blessing and not a burden to others. Help me to lead other people to you. I thank you again for being so good to me and my husband Chuck. In Jesus name I pray, amen.

#Community#Growth#Health#wellness#Happy#Happiness#Inspirational#Discover#Motivation#Life#Personaldevelopment#Dailypost#Postaday##Reasons to smile#Smile#Differentsmiles#Mentalhealth#Mental illness#Selfhelp#Selfcare#Relationships#Reflection#Feelings#honesty#Lifestyle#Sadness#Dreams#Hope


January 19, 2029

Because of heavy snow church was cancelled today. I watched In Touch with Pastor Charles Stanley. He is a great Baptist preacher with a Great message. I thought I would share this message with believers in Christ. Pastor Stanley says, like the people did in Psalm 107, the best thing we can do in a storm is to cry out to God.



see Psalm 103:7 and Psalm 107:23-32

Jesus help me, and each one of us who is going through a terrible storm today. Help us to cry out to you, to cling to you, to hold on tight. Help us to remember that you dearly love us. Help us to look in the mirror, take a good look at ourselves and help us to repent of our sins. Reveal our sins to us today. Help us to be conformed to your image. Show your power in our lives through the storms. Help us to learn something from this experience. Lord please make us strong. Please make us a better more compassionate person than we were before. Help us to know that you are with us, you love us, you will help us and that all of this is for our good. In Jesus name I pray for all of my readers today, amen.

#Community#Growth#Health#Wellness#Happy#Happiness#Inspirational#Discover#Motivation#Life#Personaldevelopment#Dailypost#Postaday#Smile#Differentsmiles#Reasonstosmile mentalhealth#Mentalillness#Selfhelp#Selfcare#Reflection#Feelings#Honesty#Lifestyle#Relationships#Sadness#Dreams#Hope

Short Blog About Friends

January 18, 2020


I love Chinese food and I love going out to lunch with my lady friends. So I invited my friends out to lunch today at a nice Chinese Restaurant (before I have surgery and chemo.) I don’t know when I will be up to going out to lunch again. We are having lunch at 1:30, despite all the snow.


Wouldn’t you know I woke up today feeling sick to my stomach with a pounding headache. I cannot tell you how many times I have organized a nice lunch with my friends and then I was too sick to go myself. Well, I am going today, no matter what. I will sip tea, order my meal and maybe I will only be able to eat the fried rice, but I will bring the rest of it home with me.


I think it is important for women to spend time with their lady friends and for men to have time to hang out with the guys. We are never too old to have fun with our friends. I think God wants us to relax at times and enjoy life and good health.


That’s all I have for today, folks. Have a great weekend and spend some time with your friends while you are still healthy enough to do so.



We had a wonderful lunch. My friends Kelly, Kathy, Bev, Jackie, Alison and Lissa were there. I ordered orange chicken- the food was amazing! We had such a nice time. I am going to miss these lunches. It may be a long time before I will be healthy enough to go out with my friends again.


The Amazing Kelly Cook

January 18, 2020


Kelly Cook is a beautiful young missionary wife. She and her husband had to return to the United States of America because she has leukemia. Today I was invited to join Kelly’s group on FaceBook. I don’t remember much of what I read (I usually don’t) but her photos were amazing.


Let me back up. When I had breast cancer at age 45, in 2006 I woke up every morning and my pillow was covered with my hair. Big gobs of it also fell out every time I took a shower. I could not go swimming without tying a bandana that covered my entire head. I waited to shave my head back then because I was going to my beautiful niece’s wedding. At one point at the reception I was sitting outside, crying as I told my sister Sue how weak and tired I was and how my hair was falling out and that I would have to shave my head. When I did have my hair shaved, tears poured down my face.


In the photos on FaceBook, Kelly Cook’s sister was shaving Kelly’s head, and they looked like they were having fun. There Kelly sat, bald and smiling. In one tender photo her husband kissed her cheek. I couldn’t get over this woman happy and smiling. I wrote to her and told her I have breast cancer and that her testimony meant so much to me. I told her she was a comfort, an encouragement and an inspiration to me.


Lord, help me to be more like Kelly Cook. Help me to stop feeling sorry for myself and smile- dare I dsay it- to even be happy in the face of adversity. Jesus, please help me to inspire others as Kelly has inspired me. In Jesus name I pray, amen.



January 17, 2020


Okay the team of 30 oncology doctors recommended that I get my mastectomy first and my chemo down the road. We meet with the surgeon on Wednesday. That is what we wanted. So what do I do in the meantime?


I keep really busy- I read Scripture. I read funny FaceBook posts. I read emails. I color my brains out. I watch Dick Van Dyke’s tv show Diagnosis Murder. I take care of the dogs and cat.,I clean my house. I try to turn my brain off.


I try not to think that I WILL be getting chemotherapy later on. I will be sick to my stomach for months. I will be as weak and tired as a wet dishcloth, unable to clean my house or cook meals for my husband. I will lose all the hair on my head, my eyebrows and my eyelashes. I will be bald and ugly. Wigs are tight, itchy and very uncomfortable but they look real pretty. Hats and scarves will probably be the route I take.


I also try not to think about how I will feel after I have my breasts cut off and I have nothing there but ugly back scars. I will have a big sagging belly and no breasts. Yes I can get a bra with pouches in it and small rubber breasts to put inside the pouches but I will go from a D cup to an A cup. An A cup is pretty much the same as no breasts at all- especially on a large woman. I will be in pain for weeks recovering from the surgery. I try not to think about any of that.


I am happy to be having the surgery before the chemo. I want to put off having chemo for just a little bit longer. I would rather be in physical pain for months than be sick as a dog for months.


I do not want to try alternative methods. This is not the flu; it is cancer and I do not want home remedies. I don’t care how long they have been around or who cured her own cancer.


I am blessed. God has poured out his love on me and showered his blessings through the many people who love me and my husband Chuck and are praying for both of us. My husband is going through this with me. Chuck has no problem with the big ugly scars or the chemo- he will have me do anything that will keep my from dying and spare him from my death and his excruciating pain and grief. And I really do want to live and grow old with my husband, my family, my friends, my church, and my animals.


So, today, right now I will keep very very busy. I will pray and ask God to help me get through one day at a time.